Loved.

 

Blink if you love me.

Aww, shucks! ♥ 

Pray tell.

Sometimes, that's what everyone want to hear. 

Pug Love.

 

 

Bump.

That awkward moment when you bump into someone.

Always loved.

Last Christmas, you were still here. 

How quickly time flies. Next month and it'll be a year without you.

I miss you babygirl. :)

Mussie, 

You know, perhaps its silly. But someone sent me this link; someone you know, and maybe, just maybe........ I know you're always with me, in my heart and beside me, and that you're still alive and kicking as long as you still live in my memories. Thank you dear friend. You've always been loyal and I may not been the best owner. mother and friend, but as according to people around, you were the one they saw that I loved most. I did and still love you. May you rest in peace. I'll always cherish our memories together; the laughters, the times I'd sneakily feed you though mommy said that I shouldn't, the bubble baths you took and ended up smelling either like a baby or me. =) 

I love you, and  Merry Christmas! ♥

Makes me Giggly.

My 'person'.

Since it's 2:32am now, I'll just make this a short post.

Someone made someone a really happy girl today. All this while, I've known about my present. A birthday present which was said and described to be a "person" (directly quoting), but only today did I actually see it, or to be exact, take it home. It rode at the backseat, with brother strapping it with the safety belt to ensure its safety home. (How adorable is that! Brother dearest insisted to safety-belt it.)

Want to see my 'person'?

My 'person', which I shall have to think of a nice name for. 

Should it be a girl? or a boy? TEEHEE!

Thank you so much Phil, for the lovely gift!

Now I seriously feel that my birthday gift to you is insufficient! GOSH!

I LOVE YOU!

Hence now my silliness unleashed.

From 2010 to 2011.

4:07am: Casual-conversation-with-you.

The time states the moment of this being written.

Can you hear my thoughts?

Can you feel what is going on in here?

I somehow doubt you do if you say so.

Unless you're Him.

I was talking.
It started off with rolling about in bed.
Rolled til I didn't want to roll anymore.
It feels like I woke up from sleep or something.
Just so filled with energy that I have no idea what to do with it but to blog now.

It's been so long since I had such a long chat with my Daddy.

It wasn't just any talk. It was more heart-to-heart. Some things that I wouldn't even tell anyone or even dare write it out. Perhaps in a picture, but it would be so abstract that eventually I'll forget what it means and look back at it with a daze wondering, trying so hard to crack what it was before.

Alot is going through my mind. Is, has, and will, still continuing.

God knows when I'll finally be able to sleep, but it sure isn't right now.

Hence, whoever you are, you'll have to bear the pain of read further into my blogpost.

To you, reading this. You know what?

Don't forget to smile. Even how significantly fake it might be.

Smile because you can.

Smile because you should.

Smile, because it makes a difference in everything you do and see.

Laughter works too, fyi.

I should know it works, because even looking back at the memories, looking up into the sky. When I'm not smiling, tears flood my eyes from all the pain, but while smiling, the feeling changes, well at least now, I see beauty in things, appreciating the moment.

I made a promise to myself.

Alot of promises in one.

I know it's lame or just plain cheesy writing about it here.
But you know, it is because I'm writing it here that I can't take it back. Even to myself.
Perhaps I won't tell you what it is. Or else (you know who you are) will rub it in for me everytime I break it, but it is because I'm human that I know that I might break it. I don't know how long I'd last with this promise. I don't how many times I'll break it by forgetting it. But what I know is that I'll try. I'll try to NOT break it. I know I shouldn't, because at least that's how much I owe myself that promise.

I hardly make promises. If you know me, you should know.

I'm making an exception to myself. Because, I can.

And I think that alot of people should just be like that. Do things, just because you can. But of course do consider the feelings of others. And when I say 'do things', that doesn't mean have sex or go one-night-standing every girl or guy at sight. Seriously, that's not what I mean. And please don't do that. No jokes.

But anyways, wish me luck in this.
I have a call coming in, and have to seriously knock myself out cold soon.
Guess what, I manage to write this in half an hour.
I know this isn't my usual posts, but what the heck. It's my page :)

So CHEERS yal!

P/S: 

For those who hasn't notice it or are new to this blog, I removed the chatbox where you could opine away for the simple reason that it was firstly redundant, and secondly, there were too many unknown people commenting (though they were encouraging and nice comments about the blog and post and all) but linked their names to some unknown website and a few VIRUS links - which the last one just crossed the line. I'm sorry I had to remove it, for the safety of EVERYONE, not only my own laptop, but whoever else who pops in to view the posts. So if you have any comments or thoughts, do feel free to comment. If it's worth the reply, I'll definitely reply. But if it's just a 'lol' or '...', seriously I don't even know what to reply to that. Try your luck though. =) CHEERS!

Parting is never easy.

Significant pieces that you'll find in every song that cross your mind. ♥

It has been perhaps almost three months since you landed here.
Small and cute, some rather tall, all super nice.
It has been a real pleasure to have 'lived' with you, though a mere 5 to 7 hours daily.
At times some of you would drive me so mad.
While some other are gems and super pleasant.

Well, as they say, life is always full of ups and downs.
In this few hours of a day, I've truly felt it all.
From being so appreciated, to being so accused, to being so guilty for having to raise my voice to keep the peace and order of the class; which always saddens me, as I do not wish to have done so.
Know that has always been my last resort.

Tsk! I should be sleeping right now.
However I can't. Perhaps you are all in my mind.
I didn't know how attached I got to you.
It honestly is the irony of life.

Everyday, most of the time, and often we say goodbye.
To think that we would have be trained for parting.
Still, it is ever so hard to accomplish without feeling so heavy hearted.
I'll definitely miss all of you. My precious little lovers! ♥


PS: Our pictures will definitely be uploaded. I'm sorry for delaying it. Know that they are all precious to me!♥

Letter for you.

In the wise words of Adele,

I dare you to let me be your one and only.

I promise I’m worthy to hold in your arms.

So come on and give me a chance,

to prove that I am the one who can walk that mile.

Love, 

Me.

Perfect crime.

You're my mezza mela.

 Let's you and me commit the perfect crime.

I'll steal your heart and you steal mine.

Last hour of 16.

Your last words were:

I'll always be with you no matter where I am in the world.

PS: This here sort of resembles you. Teehee! 

Bon voyage mon précieux. 

No matter where you are now, just so you know, you're always missed, 

and have never left my heart and mind. 

The memories I shall treasure always. 

Until day 1 where you and I will start with first glances as strangers again.

h&k.

What's for Valentine's Day?

Saw alot of societies doing something, and suddenly I'm reminded of secondary school time when people would pay money to get things delivered to other people and some, even to people from other schools. If you're thinking about the upcoming month and gift gifting, then yes, you've most probably figured it out. The thing I'm thinking about and have been thinking about the past few days is Valentine's day.


"Will I finally celebrate it with someone?"
"Will I spend the time with my precious darlings and dears?"
"What gift to get?"
"What would they like?"
"What would my valentine like?"
But firstly the question : "Would you be my Valentine?"
*Teehee!*

Anyways, my favourite memes are going to show you what they do for their valentine!
Check them out below! (=

So anyway, Cheers! 

This is a short post. Yes it is. 

But before I adjourn, I would like to ask for opinions (if anyone would like to give some),

of ....What would you give your Valentine?

No matter it's for a girl or boy or even mom or dad, 

What would your gift be for your Valentine?

(=

And with that I bid thee farewell~

Hope to get some feedback from you guys.

Cheerio!

You're always my favourite.

The time was 9.40 that we left you there. The car's time was 10.10, and I would like to keep it that way. Why? Because 10.10 is a smiley face, and you will always be remembered that way because you never fail to make my heart melt and smile again.

Before 9.40.
I had 10 whole hours with you. To think that crying the whole night would have made you use up all your tears, but I guess humans just don't dehydrate that way. Not sleeping at all, hugging you and watching over you was never the same as it used to be. Call it empathetic or pathetic, but seeing the one you love in agony isn't really something easy to do. Every movement so difficult, always leading to more hardships and cries from you. A mother watching her child suffer could just be the worst case scenario ever!

The doc said not to be sad, as she had a good life with you.
"You gave her a good life, and you shouldn't be sad about that."
11 years with me. Everyone said you were pampered and a princess. Being all diva and stuff. But to me, you're just angelic. Pampered because I loved you so. (..and still do.)

Reaching hometown was a pain. Had already started crying in the car. Thinking of what would happen to you. I want you alive. But how could I be so selfish as to keep you in suffering just for me to have more hugs, to have more time with you. I thought of everything possible. If it were arthritis, maybe medicine will cure you. But no blood seems to be going to your legs. Would you need amputation? If you did, wouldn't that just makes it more hurtful for you? And the inconvenience it will bring you. __I didn't want that for you.
Yet, I could not bare myself to let you go.

At the surgical table you laid. To put or not to put. That was the question everyone wanted an answer for. The doc suggested to put. I knew I had to. But the look in your eyes said you didn't want to give up. You looked so innocent, like nothing was happening and your pain didn't exist. I asked my brother. From his looks, I knew the answer. But he too couldn't bare saying it. His eyes reddening as he looked away. I held it in (the tears), to call mummy. But just the simple thought of it made me burst into tears. Mummy said to let her go, as it was too suffering. Then she said wait, as she intercom daddy. I already knew the answer. It was just the most kindest humane decision which just simply had to be the toughest to make. At last, I told the doc to pull the plugs.

Saying goodbye.
I just wished time moved so slowly then. I held her in my arms. Hugging her for the last time. Kissed both her cheeks and then forehead. Mummy told her on the phone that she'll be going to heaven, and told her to wait for us there. Someday, we'll meet again. I just kept telling her I love her and told her to be good. My last kiss to her, I can still taste her lips. I miss her smell already. Her warmth and 'helicopter' tail. (Only when she's super happy.) That was our last goodbye. (To think that everyday we say goodbye we'd be prepared for days like this. Tsk.)

Driving home.
Brother dear and I weeped like we had secrets. I held it in, driving faster just to get home so I could scream it all out into my pillow. (The pillow I shared with her.)

Home.
Boy I was so wrong. To think that leaving her there was the hardest. Reaching home- stepping in. First sight, the piano. The piano where she usually sits beside or near the pedals when I use to practice pieces. She loved music. Second was the floor near the table. Her stain on the floor. (Holding in my tears, pacing faster to my room.) Third thing I saw was the sofa where I use to take pictures of her as she sleep so cutely in a circle and sometimes just in funny positions. Looking away and to my room door, I see the floor. The one just before the kitchen's with pink tiles. -The floor right in front of my room. Reminds me more of her because of the countless times she's tried to 'mark her territory' there, and practically everyone of us (sometimes including guests) would fall for her trap. Gosh the menace she was then! Now, I wish I could see it again.

My baby Mussie.
You shall always be cherished. 11 physical years together, and the rest shall be the memories I carry of you with me through out the rest of my life. I will miss your big googly eyes. Your wet (sometimes) pinkish nose. Your one tooth! The "=P" look you forever have. The day when you had skin disease, but now it's gone. The day you were once fat. Even the day when you morphed from 'the model' to 'the anorexic model'. Every memory of you, forever in my memory.
[18/1/1996 - 14/1/2011]

One of her favourite spots in my room. (My bag)

Riding in the car. Looking at sceneries. She loves looking at wheels. No idea why though.

Perfect timing picture? Coincidently, I have another picture of her like in 2004 with the same exact take. Me in the background and she's yawning also. But in the older picture; showing her teeth!

Playtime with the twins. Baby's jealous Monroe's on her pillow. *Teehee!

This one is just so beautiful of her. 

Baby & I.

Baby's always camera-shy.

[You will forever be loved. I love you babygirl.]

♥

Wanting so bad to hug you one more time. I miss you Mussie!

Wanted.

Just got some online stuff. Was so excited and intrigued about it. Was totally not expecting to arrive so early, but darn glad to hear it was in the mail for me! However that happiness was a little too quickly evaporated. I bought some stuff, which was similar to something I had, and still have, but is already broken. I stared at it with amaze and utter glee, though somewhat doubting that it is the same thing as I had because of the casing and all. The look of it from outside its shell was so different.- Maybe because there was some liquid in it to retain its form. It didn't matter then. I kept it until I reached home to my room to open the surprise. It looked the same, felt the same, and well it didn't really have any smell- just like the previous one. 

....A big big But..... it just wasn't the same when put on. -looks,feeling and all. [Sighs] 

When will I ever find back the broken precious love I had? Now, I'll just have to do with what I have. Improvise I guess with things exterior to it. Until I can find it again. Until I have enough cash to get it again. Til then..... this is me, emoing about over broken glass of milk. Is it half empty or half full? Does it matter if you can't ever drink from it again? -[Tsk]

Anyways, will try to take some pictures of it. Then those whom are wondering what that broken thing is, will see it's unveiling. Til the 'picture-taking-mood' comes, Cherio. 

Cheers! (:

Rules kids don't learn in school - Charles Sykes.

Rule 1: Life is not fair - get used to it! 

Rule 2: The world doesn't care about your self-esteem. The world will expect you to accomplish something BEFORE you feel good about yourself. 

Rule 3: You will NOT make $60,000 a year right out of high school. You won't be a vice-president with a car phone until you earn both. 

Rule 4: If you think your teacher is tough, wait till you get a boss. 

Rule 5: Flipping burgers is not beneath your dignity. Your Grandparents had a different word for burger flipping: they called it opportunity. 

Rule 6: If you mess up, it's not your parents' fault, so don't whine about your mistakes, learn from them. 

Rule 7: Before you were born, your parents weren't as boring as they are now. They got that way from paying your bills, cleaning your clothes and listening to you talk about how cool you thought you were. So before you save the rain forest from the parasites of your parent's generation, try delousing the closet in your own room. 

Rule 8: Your school may have done away with winners and losers, but life HAS NOT. In some schools, they have abolished failing grades and they'll give you as MANY TIMES as you want to get the right answer. This doesn't bear the slightest resemblance to ANYTHING in real life. 

Rule 9: Life is not divided into semesters. You don't get summers off and very few employers are interested in helping you FIND YOURSELF. Do that on your own time. 

Rule 10: Television is NOT real life. In real life people actually have to leave the coffee shop and go to jobs. 

Rule 11: Be nice to nerds. Chances are you'll end up working for one.

Others which I got from another website while browsing through the book to see more rules.

p.17 In talking about the self-esteem movement Charles writes "Ask yourself if it is better to feel good about your swimming abilities, or to actually know how to swim."

p.63 In response to teenagers who want to save the world Charles quotes P. J. O'Rourke who said "Everybody wants to save the earth; nobody wants to help Mom do the dishes."

p.67 "The Habit of blaming other people for your problems is easily acquired and difficult to shake."

p.73 "A willingness to be offended at the smallest slight is not a sign of superior consciousness -- it is a decision to be a whiner and an emotional bully."

p.90 "There's something ironic about the number of people who are careful to put only low-fat, sugar-free, vegan, whole-grain, organic food into their months and who then turn around and pump raw sewage into their heads."

p.112 Bill Swanson CEO of Raytheon said "A person who is nice to you but rude to the waiter, or to others, is not a nice person."

p.121 Charles ridicules government attempts to fix obesity. "Apparently we're also supposed to assume that youngsters who tune out millions of parents, blow off thousands of gym teachers, and ignore the incentives of being attractive to the opposite sex will somehow listen to the federal government."

p.133 Charles took his family to Gettysburg. He wondered "How in God's name did they ever make this boring? How did our schools decide this wasn't worth teaching and that if it was worth teaching, it should be taught badly, carefully gutted of anything that might capture the imagination of children?"

p.144 "If you have any friends who resent your success, you should recognize this obvious fact: they aren't really your friends in any sense of the word."

Small things.

Like the saying,

"Its the small things in life that makes it all worth while."

"To enjoy the little moments in life."

To enjoy it all.

The little laughs.

The little nifty stuffs.

All the cute stuffs.

Even chocolates are small. (haha)

So here are some of the things I found in my room.

Small cute yummy stuff.

-Pencil; I used as a mustache ❤ ^~^

-Red dog; Patrick! ❤

-Little cow; my pencil case.

-Tiger; a gift from a friend ❤

-Sunflower Lollipop; memories with friends buying lollies. ❤

-Chocolate; yummy! ❤

-Smile; just because all those things make me happy! ❤

Chuckles

So, cheers to all the small things in life.

Don't get too distracted by the big stuff when all the small are so good!

Cheers! ❤

Kiddo!

...Being a kid again never felt this awesome.

It was one of those days where
people don't get enough sleep,
people turn into pandas; literally.
being all blurry and into bamboos. (laughs)

Had a presentation early early at 8am. but was satisfactory as our group didn't get much bad criticism from the lecturer.


--Here comes the serious part--（¯﹃¯）


Still, from here, the part of
'Not to judge a book by its cover'
..and how..
'People see the sawdust in other's eyes but not the plank in front of their eyes'

1)Looking at other's appearance, do not underestimate (or overestimate) their capability. You may get your heart skipping a beat from the unpredictable outcome. If its that way, might as well just not estimate, not expecting and just BE LIKE A KID and be surprised at whatever may come at you and live fully in it.
* the most awestruck feeling ever! *

2)And then there is the sawdust thingy.
To have introspection; Reflect on one's own thoughts and feelings .
Its easy to point out what you see others' mistakes are. What their flaws are, but how bout yourself? You act as a mirror to the person where you see all that is done by him/her which she don't see em', that's where as a friend, associate, supervisor, senior shall point out to the person. But being so, still you need to keep check of yourself.




--its a dilemma of whether to laugh or to pity-- ╮(╯_╰)╭

At times it feels hilarious how when YOU point out people's flaws which are also actually your own. But yet, no one tells you about it, it kinda seems ruth, that at least since you pointed out other's flaws, they may be aware of their mistakes and change. But, its not for you.
* YOU; are the person in which is a big influence to how we would conduct our lives here while still in this organization. Also one of the components why its hard to tell you. Egoistic is another one of your strong traits which no one dares to step into.


--Being a kid-- O(∩_∩)O


..this is where being a kid really is awesome.
Although, there's the
"What's yours is mine,
and what's mine is mine." ~for toys, food, etc. (LOL)
..but still, the thought of needless criticism and just laughing all the way is awesome. There are lots of things in which need not be stressed about.
* Sweets, Pacifier, Dolls, and playing dress-up can be rather pleasing.
ESPECIALLY the NAPPING part. ♥ *


--Here's the BEST PART of it--(╯▽╰)




Today, someone taught me how to say the word 'K'. =3
like how in kindergarten, the teachers will teach how to pronounce and repeat saying K. K. K. K. K. over and over again.
Though its kinda silly to just repeat the word eventhough you know it.
But still its an awesome silly scene!

..listening to that someone saying K, imagining the person's lips' movement,
and how that person laughs at how silly you are and yet it actually seems like you are actually fooling that someone who think you're silly... WICKED! ~\(≧▽≦)/~